Happy birthday Neil
Do you like the colour teal?
You’d look good in it I feel
On your birthday
What presents do you have Neil?
A carbon fibre wheel?
Perhaps a glockenspiel
For your birthday
What have you got planned Neil?
Going for a meal?
I hope the gravy won’t congeal
On your birthday
Perhaps you’ve gone away Neil
To Kent, maybe to Deal
Or further south, to Lille
For your birthday
Or a cosy day at home Neil
You could watch 'Ally McBeal'
Or the old 'Sapphire and Steel'
On your birthday
I think that’s enough Neil
I expect you’re tired of all this guff Neil
You just do your stuff Neil
It’s your birthday!
