Monday 12 December 2022

Lost

I had lost my purse, and was left with just a twenty
I felt like I was cursed and soon my pockets would be empty
I went to the cafe, I think better with tea
But the chocolate cake was looking at me 
and when I left I had just fifteen.

So my first idea, was to head for the nearest bookies
It was crystal clear, I would win money on the horses
I made my selection, it was fourteen to one
But it might as well not bothered to run
I think my gambling days are done

I wasn't through with trying to salvage the situation 
I bought a kazoo from a shop by the railway station
I went to the town square at the end of the day
Put my cap on the floor and started to play
Then the police took me away

It wasn't long before we arrived at the police station
Where I sang this song as way of an explanation
It wasn't enough they put me in a cell
Which was much cheaper than any hotel
I'll do the same tomorrow night as well.

(Based on Lost in France by Bonnie Tyler. Apologies to all concerned.)

(Write Club task based on - 'You have misplaced your purse/wallet after a shopping trip - naturally you could ring the bank to cancel your cards. You now have £20 to last you over the weekend - how/why/if - do you choose to spend it?')

Sunday 11 December 2022

Last Night it Snowed

Walking in fresh snow
Looking back at the footprints
That prove you exist

Wednesday 7 December 2022

Eagle

Riding the thermals
Your feathered majesty soars
And looks down on us

(Write Club homework based on phrase 'eagle soaring')

Thursday 1 December 2022

Advertisement (on behalf of the Shed Marketing Board of Great Britain)

In gardens and allotments it's known far and wide
A little bit of inside is brought to life outside
Don't know what it is yet? Let me be your guide

It's a place for tools that help you take
care of your garden, like a rake
I'll tell you now and no mistake
If you want to get ahead, get a shed

Lawn mower, creosote, flower pots
Perhaps a rack to dry shallots
I'll tell you again in case you forgot
If you want to get ahead, get a shed

Gardening gloves and watering can
Secateurs made in Japan
Bird food, seeds and bean shoot canes
Somewhere to shelter when it rains
Nuts and bolts and screws in jars
Bits and pieces off old cars
A raincoat with a broken zip
Items destined for the tip
Like a broken clock or a child's bed
Please remember what I've said
If you want to get ahead, get a shed